Here's where I've landed on the suprachiasmatic nucleus of the hypothalamus.

The suprachiasmatic nucleus of the hypothalamus is that chunk of brain stuff in our head that serves as our bodily clock. This lil bit of matter hiding deep in the junk drawer of our brains decides whether you are a morning person or a late riser. By the way. The only way you can use the word suprachiasmatic is when accompanied by the word nucleus. So, this word is a leech. A parasite living off the fame and notoriety of the word nucleus. Just what I would expect from a word that describes such a traitorous part of my brain. (Suprachiasmatic sounds similar to the word charismatic. And I’m sure charismatic isn’t thrilled by the association.)

Oh when I think of all the things I might have become if not for that damn suprachiasmatic nucleus telling me to sleep in! I’m stuck with a circadian rhythm that limits my success. Because here on earth, amidst the early risers, success starts at 6am. Sometimes earlier. Now, I get that if we’re talking about fishing. Or golf. But to wake up that early and start consternating on important issues just seems dangerous. That’s how people accidentally pour coffee in to their cereal. So, scientists. There has to be a way to reprogram this thing. I wanna wake up with my brain operating at full capacity. I’m not talking about inventing the next coke energy. I’m saying take the thing out, reconfigure it, and let me reach my full potential in corporate America! Wake me up when you’re done. Let’s talk about it at brunch. P.S. I wrote this around 8:22 so pardon me if it doesn’t read like Malcom Gladwell.

Mark Sunderland